I Guess We're Grown-Ups Now


Listen to the latest episode of I Guess We're Grown-Ups Now

All Episodes

These Are My Heist Friends
Episode 39 • Published Jun 29, 2018

Brook and Kari talk about adult female friendships, meeting Internet friends, friends when you’re married, the work of being a friend, the friends at work, lessons from Oceans 8, how friendships awkwardly dissipate.


Enunciate the syllables
Episode 38 • Published Mar 27, 2018

Brook and Kari talk about conferences: going to them, enjoying yourself, getting your money’s worth, doing a talk, understanding the code of conduct.


Dom Jorts
Episode 37 • Published Feb 26, 2018

Brook and Kari chat about recent movies we’ve seen, books read, and podcasts listened to. 50 Shades spoilers. Tolkien white guys. Superhero movies. Writers writing about experiences they don’t have.


What We Did On Our Vacation
Episode 36 • Published Nov 06, 2017

Brook and Kari talk about what we’ve been up to, since we haven’t been podcasting a whole lot. Some really good book, movie, TV, and podcast recommendations here. I (Kari) can’t believe I didn’t mention I listened to S-Town. Plus, we talk about gender confirmation surgery.


United By Queerness
Episode 35 • Published Jul 03, 2017

Brook and Kari talk about Pride month, celebrations, marches, mainstreaming, commodification, rainbow-washing, chanting, mourning, abstaining, and showing up for the actual work the rest of the year. Should you go? Yes.


Don't Ghost Your Parents
Episode 34 • Published May 29, 2017

Brook and Kari discuss chosen families, constructing family units, friends that stick, healthy boundaries for adults, rules for showing up for your friends.


A Man with a Bowler Hat and Rolled Up Sleeves
Episode 33 • Published Apr 29, 2017

Brook and Kari discuss drinks, from breastfeeding and tap water, to aquavit and bourbon, to weird sodas. Our favorite cocktail recipes and our basic go-to comfort drinks. Mnemonic rhymes aren’t as helpful as just not drinking too much.


Whoa Canada
Episode 32 • Published Mar 26, 2017

Kari and Brook talk about Canada. Justin Trudeau is cute. Colonialist settlement was horrible, and so is the government’s treatment of indigenous people. Pipelines, socialized medicine, parental leave, RCMP, blinking green lights, grams of salami.


Cry You Later
Episode 31 • Published Feb 09, 2017

Brook and Kari discuss crying, particularly at work, and what it means, why we do it, and what to do if you see someone doing it.


Home Poopin’
Episode 30 • Published Feb 01, 2017

Kari and Brook revisit the topic of travelling: how we pack, what we pack, how we make ourselves feel at home when away, and the weird things human bodies do when you’re on the road.


A Bad Bargain With An Elf
Episode 29 • Published Dec 30, 2016

Brook and Kari discuss children and not having them, how to get one if you need one, life scripts, undermining parents, pets and how having them is and isn’t like having kids. Brook’s cat makes us laugh and we try to describe it. Great radio.


The Green Pickle
Episode 28 • Published Dec 07, 2016

We’re back, adullllltttzzzz! Brook and Kari have come out of hibernation to hit your eardrums with a brand new episode, mostly about how to handle the holidays like a grown-up when you’re spending them with unfamiliar people, or worse, familiar people! We talk about Friendsgiving, new and old traditions, Brook loves a good yule.


Jargon and Stats
Episode 27 • Published Apr 18, 2016

For Grown-Ups’ first threesome, Kari and Brook are joined by Kayleigh to talk about polyamorism, paramours and metamours and poly unicorns, cis/straight and queer poly, models and structures of poly relationships, how to (and how not to) go polyamorous, jealousy, compersion, and how poly is like Agile. Turns out, Kari’s the only one who’s seen Three’s Company. Also, we talk about butts.


Good Enough for Vin Diesel
Episode 26 • Published Apr 06, 2016

Kari chats with Victor Yocco about the benefits of stopping drinking, the practice of sobriety, how to support people choosing to not drink, fizzy drinks at bars, and when’s a good time to ask why someone’s not drinking (never).


Forcing It
Episode 25 • Published Mar 05, 2016

Brook and Kari talk about forcing it with desk legs, friendships, love, taxes, being disciplined, and work. Also: the question of whether telling 20-somethings to just work hard is good advice.


Civic Doodie
Episode 24 • Published Jan 23, 2016

Brook and Kari talk about the ups and downs of volunteering, kids volunteering badly, empathy and relationship building, selflessness and selfishness, how broken the system can be, doing “little” things, giving yourself credit, volunteering at work.


We Burn Something and Drink
Episode 23 • Published Jan 06, 2016

Kari and Brook talk about holiday plans, going out versus staying in, solstice, resolutions versus spontaneity, not smiling at strangers, journalling as reflection, minimalism, reading, and death to “should.” Also: cat noises.


My Friendship Car is in Miles Per Hour
Episode 22 • Published Dec 20, 2015

Brook and Kari talk about adult friendships and the Internet, cross-pollination, intensity, friending regret, breakups, retweeting, aspirational friends, attraction, homogeneity, and the roommate switch.


Playlist for Death
Episode 21 • Published Nov 23, 2015

Brook and Kari record over wine and cats, and ponder their own mortality, loved ones (including pets) dying, being ready to die, risky behavior, travelling on planes, and trying to understand death. Uplifting!


Stolen Canadian Accent
Episode 20 • Published Nov 07, 2015

Kari and Brook Shelley talk about mommy/cat blogging/podcasting, going home again, travelling on other people’s dime, accents, sci fi lit by women, revisiting old hobbies, and whole other episodes.


The Dark Side of Decisiveness
Episode 19 • Published Sep 07, 2015

Hilary (@theOtherHilary) is back to chat with Kari about hating yourself-in-other-people, respectful conversation, when and how we indulge ourselves, the statute of limitations on being mean, safe places for venting, and self-regulation.


The Jackie Chan Packing Strategy
Episode 18 • Published May 26, 2015

Kari and her guest Aditi talk about international travel, local delicacies, Airbnb, Jackie Chan’s packing strategies, friend trips, community sourced trip planning, and neck pillows.


I Have Tweets Read to Me While I Sleep
Episode 17 • Published Mar 30, 2015

Kari chats with Chris Enns about social media fasting, FOMO/JOMO, forming your own opinion, following and unfollowing strategies, satisficing, and fearlessness in podcasting.


I Can Make a Bedbug Party
Episode 16 • Published Mar 22, 2015

Kari and Liz James discuss adult ADHD: definitions, advantages, getting diagnosed, strategies for thriving with it, fantastic metaphors, treatments, marrying well, accidental vacations, and black diamond people.


Your Body Will Betray You
Episode 15 • Published Feb 24, 2015

Kari’s guest is Rebekah Bennetch and they discuss the horrors of public speaking, the formula for creating a great speech, how to practice and prepare, vocal delivery techniques, and whether you should drink before you do a speech.


Family Meeting in the Blanket Fort
Episode 14 • Published Feb 09, 2015

Kari and Megan Cheesbrough talk about advanced parenting: collaborating with minors; de-escallating bad behavior without shame; showing your children you’re on their team; negotiating with teachers; and worrying that your kid’s a sociopath.


Two Years Till Billy Crystal Levels
Episode 13 • Published Jan 23, 2015

Jeff Read joins Kari to wonder what midlife really is anyway, and to talk about middle-age parenting issues, getting worse at things, and how passion for what you do maybe helps you avoid the ol’ crisis.


Successful Instances of Shutting Up are Unheard Of
Episode 12 • Published Jan 14, 2015

Kari talks about the benefits of speaking out, and also the benefits of shutting up. And about potential future topics for I Guess We’re Grown-Ups Now.


The Meat for Sex Hypothesis
Episode 11 • Published Dec 18, 2014

Kari and Marie Cee talk about being good/bad at dating, optimal pre-date online interactions, the evolutionary psychology of monogamish relationships, and memorable dates (fishing, deer skinning, running away).


The House the Cars the Dog the Cat
Episode 10 • Published Dec 08, 2014

Part two of the conversation with Adam Clark. Should we even bother looking for meaning in our job? Searching for that feeling of Home. Regret. How does a person end up in a corporate job, and is that different from selling out?


You’ve Just Got to Stop Thinking
Episode 9 • Published Dec 01, 2014

Kari talks with Adam Clark about the trouble with answering the question “What do you do?” and tying your identity to your work; worrying about not having value to add to the world; not having all the answers; fear of looking like a fool; and the importance of just showing up.


It’s like Skiing
Episode 8 • Published Nov 13, 2014

Hilary Nelson and Kari discuss being active in your community and its government, sympathy for city counselors, not being an a**hole, and why you should vote even if you haven’t done your homework.


An Act of Political Warfare
Episode 7 • Published Nov 07, 2014

Kari talks about the importance of self-care, how to recognize a personal crisis before it happens, what to do if it does happen, and how she shouldn’t be on your survival team.


20,000 People Laughing
Episode 6 • Published Oct 17, 2014

Kari sits down with Todd Peters to talk about about his creative alternative adult life: SAHDing, not having a grand life-plan, being a self-taught professional musician, and balance in adult relationships. There’s a lot of laughing, which is normal for a conversation with Todd.


Ask Me About My IUD
Episode 5 • Published Oct 09, 2014

Kari talks with Kate Daly about the Pill, IUDs, sponges, access to knowledge about your own body, sex ed, and bad birth control puns. We share pregnancy pics with fun back-stories and probably way TMI. Sorry not sorry.


Try Uni No Wait Don’t Try Uni
Episode 4 • Published Oct 03, 2014

Kari and her guest Garth Braithwaite talk all things food and being a grown-up: managing hangry-ness, marrying into food traditions, living with diabetes, LDS food guidelines, what we eat after our kids are in bed, and how to find a sushi mentor. Garth digs how Kari says “avocado.”


Grain Truck Full of Beer
Episode 3 • Published Sep 27, 2014

Kari talks with Sheena Greer about divorce, second weddings, the care and feeding of second marriages, blending families, and giving yourself gifts instead of treats. And how Sheena’s life goals include being a member of Run-DMC.


Retire Before I Die
Episode 2 • Published Sep 23, 2014

Kari and Jay Baron talk about comparing our adult lives to our parents, perpetual adolescence, what it’s like being a role model, and scratching undone things off the bucket list. We try really hard not to be a parenting podcast.


Scotch and Poprocks
Episode 1 • Published Sep 16, 2014

Introducing Kari’s new podcast about adulthood. An overview of the themes and topics that future episodes will cover, and a call-out for people interested in joining in on a discussion. Most episodes will be less formal and scripted than this one.